Awkwardness - A Social Phenomenon That's Not About You.
The idea that awkwardness is a personal trait that we can't change or grow out of is a myth. Rather, it's the result of social situations where our unwritten scripts for interacting with others have broken down. This is according to Alexandra Plakias, a philosopher and author of "Awkwardness: A Theory." When these scripts are unclear or mismatched, we're forced into an uncomfortable improv moment.
While some people may experience awkwardness more frequently due to their personality traits, social anxiety, or self-consciousness, it's essential to recognize that awkwardness is not solely about the individual. It can also be a result of external factors such as the other person's behavior or the situation itself. A conversation with someone who is clearly disengaged from you, for example, can make small talk feel forced and awkward.
In these situations, taking ownership of our emotions and reactions can help us respond more thoughtfully. Practicing uncertainty, clarifying our priorities, and exposing ourselves to uncomfortable situations without judgment can all be beneficial in reducing the power that awkwardness holds over us.
While cringe - a feeling of embarrassment or discomfort after a social interaction - often follows awkward moments, it's essential to distinguish between the two. Awkwardness is about navigating unclear social scripts in real-time, whereas cringe is more about reflecting on past interactions and beating ourselves up over perceived mistakes.
The inability to navigate these interactions can lead to losses such as lost connections and missed opportunities for meaningful conversations. By recognizing that awkwardness is a social phenomenon rather than a personal failing, we can approach it with empathy and understanding.
The idea that awkwardness is a personal trait that we can't change or grow out of is a myth. Rather, it's the result of social situations where our unwritten scripts for interacting with others have broken down. This is according to Alexandra Plakias, a philosopher and author of "Awkwardness: A Theory." When these scripts are unclear or mismatched, we're forced into an uncomfortable improv moment.
While some people may experience awkwardness more frequently due to their personality traits, social anxiety, or self-consciousness, it's essential to recognize that awkwardness is not solely about the individual. It can also be a result of external factors such as the other person's behavior or the situation itself. A conversation with someone who is clearly disengaged from you, for example, can make small talk feel forced and awkward.
In these situations, taking ownership of our emotions and reactions can help us respond more thoughtfully. Practicing uncertainty, clarifying our priorities, and exposing ourselves to uncomfortable situations without judgment can all be beneficial in reducing the power that awkwardness holds over us.
While cringe - a feeling of embarrassment or discomfort after a social interaction - often follows awkward moments, it's essential to distinguish between the two. Awkwardness is about navigating unclear social scripts in real-time, whereas cringe is more about reflecting on past interactions and beating ourselves up over perceived mistakes.
The inability to navigate these interactions can lead to losses such as lost connections and missed opportunities for meaningful conversations. By recognizing that awkwardness is a social phenomenon rather than a personal failing, we can approach it with empathy and understanding.
It's not because they're being rude or disobedient, but because it makes the conversation feel forced and awkward...like we're stuck in an uncomfortable improv moment 
. But honestly, I think it's super helpful for them to learn how to navigate these situations and take ownership of their emotions 
. We need to practice being more understanding and empathetic with each other when things don't go as planned 
.
I mean, who hasn't been there? You're stuck in a conversation with your aunt's friend's cousin (yes, that many levels of family connection) and you have no idea what to talk about. It's like trying to solve a puzzle blindfolded while being attacked by bees 
! But for real though, the key is to just roll with it and not sweat it too much. Like, take a deep breath and remember that everyone's just winging it in their own way 
, but idk if people realize its actually just cuz the situation or other ppl's behavior is weird, not because they're a total clumsy person 
. so yeah, awkwardness is def not just about u, its also about how u interact w/ others and the situations u find urself in 
. But what's key is recognizing that awkwardness can be a result of external factors too, like someone being disengaged or the situation itself 
. We need to take ownership of our emotions and reactions, practice uncertainty, and step out of our comfort zones #PersonalGrowth . And let's not forget, cringe moments don't define us - they're just awkwardness's lesser-known cousin 
.
So, instead of trying to fit into their script, try being the one who writes a new one – for yourself. Practice being okay with uncertainty, and own those awkward moments. You might be surprised at how liberating it feels 
... but yeah, I think this article got me thinking about how often it's not just our own issues that make us feel awkward. Like, have you ever been to a party where you don't really vibe with the host? It totally throws off your whole vibe and makes everything feel forced and awkward 
... 
... 
.
. btw, anyone tried practicing "improv moments" like alexandra plakias suggested? 
Alexandra Plakias is onto somethin! think its super relatable 2 feel like ur stuck in these improv moments 
we need 2 practice takin ownership of our emotions & reactions, instead of 2 beat ourselves up over it 